Smile!

Why I’m so funny and why I have a dream to educate the world on how to act in a bar:

(The following events are a true story, name of the character has been changed due to completely humiliating this person.)


Weird creepy loser drunk guy: “Hey can I have a beer?”

The world’s most talented bartender on the east coast: “Sure…what kind?”

WCLDG: “Ugh…surprise me”

TWMTBOTEC: “Not really sure what you want, all we have left is Stella, Bud and Bud light”

WCLDG: “Aghhh forget it, I don’t have any money anyway.”

TWMTBOTEC: “So if you don’t have money to buy a beer, why did you order one?”

WCLDG: “Well, I could get one with my smile.”

WCLDG proceeds to smile and just proved that he has horrible genetics, never brushed and/or chewed on rocks everyday for 6 years.

TWMTBOTEC: “How about I give you two beers to never smile around me again?”

Yet another confused person on how to act in a bar. WCLDG…see what you don’t understand, is that a smile will only get you so far in life, a really bad smile will get you nowhere in life. So, spend some extra hours at the office, or whatever it is you do and save save save for that one time you have an urge to grab a beer. Money=beer.